How To Seem Like A Drunkard

From Modern Drunkard Magazine:

6. Have blackouts. A well-placed phone call works wonders. Ring up your drinking buddy the next day (early afternoon is best) and ask him how you got home last night and if he knows where your other shoe is. When you show up for the next big night and he remarks on how you seem to have found your other shoe, immediately get a new drinking buddy, as this one, judging by how much attention he pays to shoes, is obviously gay. If you already knew he was gay, tell him you just loved them so much you had to run out and buy a replacement pair. He will respect this.

I'll share with you my new favorite beverage for those times that don't rise to the demands of a fine single malt: Campari and soda. Campari is one of those things that's like nothing else. It's bitterer than Al Gore yet much, much more interesting.